Former campaign manager for presidential candidate Chris Christie, Hobo Ken was removed from his position for making false claims to the Department of Justice. Ken jealous of the media attention Former President Trump was receiving since his indictment devised a plan to get Christie more airtime. The ousted campaign director went full whistleblower and claimed Christie was guilty of wrong-doing which resulted in charges being brought against the former New Jersey Governor and presidential candidate, for perceived past offenses.
Startling claims date back to many years ago and are posted below.
Conspiracy to enter a closed beach during a government shutdown, and it’s not like he was discreet about it either.
Use of a metal beach chair that was neither compostable nor environmentally friendly.
Indecent behavior, a woman came forward saying the then Governor of New Jersey pressed his groin area into her thigh at baseball game, staining her sundress. Update: This claim was later dismissed, when a photo circulating on social media, showed Christie was talking with his hands and accidentally nudged the woman with his mayo covered hot dog.
Accepting gifts while in office, witnesses allege Christie willfully and knowingly accepted 2 plates of Chicken Milanese and 4 truffle brownie bites at the Atlantic City Republican Women’s meetup and luncheon.
The presidential candidate was also recorded privately saying that Jon Bon Jovi was a better singer than Bruce Springsteen. The controversial statement resulted in Christie hiring several bodyguards to accompany him everywhere he goes in the Garden State.
While in office, Gov. Christie had a private server in his basement. Update: again, thrown out. It was later revealed that the woman was an Applebee’s server that Christie used to cater poker nights. The server also said she didn’t have any classified information other than she overheard Christie call the Mayor of Elizabeth a lying cheat and card counter. No word on if the DOJ has offered an apology or at least a free voucher for some chicken wings.
And finally, last on the list, the testimony of a tearful man who lost his toll money at the George Washington Bridge when Governor Christie shut down the lanes in Fort Lee, NJ. The man said he expressed his outrage to the Governor’s office and they told him to shut his trap, it was chump change.
Update: The defamed campaign manager is seeking counsel from Hunter Biden’s attorney Chris Clark so he should come out smelling like a sweetheart.
